Tuesday

How is it that such a seemingly innocuous day could become so dreaded, so despised as a Tuesday? 

It doesn't happen because of the name or place on the calendar. 

Nothing really tied to a specific date.

Why then?

For me, Tuesday pushes in my face all of my failures, all of my fears, all of my frustrations, insecurities, anger, sadness and regret. 

Tuesday mean no questions from my son. No staying up too late to read. No more drawings or dinners reciting another "story about when I was a kid..."

Tuesday is that forced smile I get at the door. The "how are you" that is as hollow as hell. 

Tuesday comes too quickly and hurts for too long. 

Tuesday reminds me that she left not just for her co-worker long ago, but "me" even before that.

Tuesday beckons me back to an empty, silent house. No longer a home. More like a shell waiting for what will be decided by a mediator by a process and not by a family. 

Tuesday is hell.

Wednesday is one step closer to Sunday...

I never knew 2.5 days could mean so much. I'll never take so many things for granted...